Try this

Pockethole

Flashing electric lights - they dont sting
moving colours - they run into each other
random flashes of thought- they skip one after another
heartbeat sounds
..and a smirk

cos i'm not wat i wanna be
cos i'm not really happy
am i now??

slightly sure but not fully
oh! tHose colours flash again in the dark
snap back to reality
snap back to madness
snap back to sadness
snap back to happiness
snap again...where am i??

back in the multi-coloured wilderness
with that secret still in mind
clinging like a leech
is life really worth its pain?
obviously yes...snap...not

so i was sitting - an audience
"wats ur problem?", he asked.
people cried and replied.
the ocean swelled
waves got larger
people were crazy now
i was in the middle....thinking

The water was cold...and it was utter chaos
people died around - they sank but they cried wen they were alive - like me.

The ocean unleashed its fury all around.
he had a smile.
i faced him and begged.
"I can't help u"
I spat.
"Not in my control"
"Who is to blame, then??"
"No one"

The ocean retreated. People were groping - still alive.
You've gotta be happy.
Love a walkman, a bike, a car ? - buy it
gotta hold on till the end cos no one is happy
..but no one is sad now..they shall soon be.

the image faded..back into the colours.

It said

"open your eyes, its best i cant accept u or reject u. that is how it is. live it and colour it better than this can, for man has always. Be made of diamond cos others are brittle"

My take on Humour

Well, to begin with - There are various kinds of humour, the silly kind, the outright funny kind, the patterened kind, the goofy kind... and ya, the list goes on..

Like every individual is unique, every person has his own unique sense of humour and unique tastes in humour. His sense and his ability to make humour may well depend on his tastes.

His ability also depends on the time of the day and his state of mind.
I suggest you guys watch Borat. Kind of perverted humour though. But now, come on. No joke is superior to the other. Humour is not differentiated on the basis of caste, creed, colour, sex, religion or nationality except American humour which is inferior. You must listen to some of thier "knock-knock" jokes. You'll definitely laugh but that is at the teller's stupidity. You might even get yourself to wonder at what point of time the evolution of thier brain stopped. But who am I to talk.I also highly recommend Southpark. I do have some respect for the creators.

Well, talking about not differentiating one kind of humour from the other, I was wondering if there were militants in this field also. "Hey, do you remember the Semptember 11 incident, the Al- Qaeda took over the American world Trade Centre building and cracked aweful jokes and had the whole of the American citizens in the building dying of laughter.
and then Bush declared war on Afghanistan, landed their troops there and told the people American jokes and made the whole of their country laugh at American jokes...muahahaha. Those bastards." Just thinking...thats all.. the world would have been so much more of a happier place to live in. What i am indulging in right now is silly humour and i specialise in it. So here's a caution - If by any chance your IQ falls in the above 90 range, you may please stop reading and may go about doing your work. Shit!! now i'll have only American readers.

My friend once asked me,"Su, man i see you doing nothing. whats your aim in life??" I remember being quite puzzled. My aim isn't that good. I average a score of 70 in bowling. but then i got thinking about that question. So I hereby declare my aim - To make the largest collection of really funny jokes in my blog. So people please contribute funny stuff. I'll make sure that your name is listed below the joke.Videos of stupid ads, one liners - anything.

What kind are you??? I am...

Today, in value education class, the guy told us that there are 5 kinds of people.

1) People who do good to society and sometimes even at their own personal cost.
2)People who first think of themselves, then about others.
3)People who put their selfish needs above everything and achieve them even at the cost of the nation and society.
4)People who enjoy doing harm to others though they can avail no benefits for themselves,
5) Lastly, there are people who do harm to themselves in order to do cause a greater harm to society.


I believe that all these 5 kind of people exist in me. Very little of the 1st and last 2 kinds, a considerable amount of the 3rd kind but the most of the 2nd kind.

Sometimes it really becomes necessary to judge yourself and know what you actually are...and now am i happy with kind of person i am??

To tell you the truth, I am and i dont believe you can be the first person. You need to be a saint or something. The last two persons are whom i'm trying to get rid of and i am the 3rd person to some resrved people because i've realized that you will only lose by being good to these people. I might be wrong.

I am a normal person and crave for recognition, sex and money as the case is and that is the justification for my selfishness but i am happy about the fact that iI can say confidently that I am a better person than a lot many people i know. I dont want to be a judge but the mind does compare.

.....and finally, will i change?? Yes, I am open to change but only if I am sure to get the 3 needs I mentioned before and obviously this means change for the good....but it depends on the scale of what i do get. I might become bad if I do get really large chunks of the above-mentioned needs as a result. After all everyone has a Satan in him.

Wow, it was real fun writing about this and i hope to continue this writing spree. I guess next will be a story.

Nameless

This is a story i wrote long ago when my senses weren't working.....just take a look....i'd appreciate ur comments

One must have seen the way, she was looking at him, some may even say it was cute, though, Her brown eyes were bobbing up and down naughtily, her tongue was out and she was drooling onto him. Her head was on his lap. She got up on both her legs to lick his face but she flopped and fell head first on his lap. You couldn't expect this disgusting behaviour from a female, unless, of course, she was a bitch who had just no clue as to what had swept her off her feet.


TRAGEDY ON THE HIGHWAY

Disaster had struck 3 years ago. Jodie was on one of her routine evening walks when she had chosen the wrong time to dive accross the road for a careless rabbit.
The bus was running at top speed. Avoiding the dog, even with the brakes totally engaged was impossible.
Until now, Jodie had been a well fed golden retriever but now, she could no longer "retrieve".

.......and thus it came to be that she lost both her forelegs.


SOMETHING ABOUT HIM

He had been very sad. He broke his television set, the furniture and the mirror, and he broke a photo frame too, as though that was not enough damage compared to his broken heart.
He had no family members to vent his spleen on- they had all died (except the dog) and his nature prevented him from having any friends.


THE SECOND BOLT OF LIGHTNING

"Dont joke, doctor". i have never liked jokes", he said. He was holding the doctor by the collar, his face being very close to the doctor's and he was speaking with gritted teeth.
The doctor was now annoyed but his face showed fear. "Guards", he screamed, "Guards". 5 men walked into the room and pushed the joke-hater around. He fell onto a shelf which dropped a box on the ground, spilling its mysterious contents, all on the floor.
When the joke-hater was finally flung out of the clinic, all he had was a black eye, an empty pocket (the doctor and the thugs being able to extract their fees), and a tumor in his brain!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE WILD-GOOSE CHASE

(Jodie, Golden retriever, 8 years old,.......two drops of tears......., no forelegs,....a shaky 'lovable'....., in search of a new.....and an almost illegible......master)........all this on a white paper and a cheque for 50 Marks were sealed into an envelope addressed to the Editor, The Tribune. The doctor had told him that he would survive for a maximum period of 6 months and as a consequence, the otherwise aimless life had a new direction - a new master forJodie and obviously the grave.
Two weeks passed and his accomplishment was not a least bit noteworthy, except for a few consolation letters and a couple of phone calls.
Who would want an 8 year old dog without forelegs ??!!
He then offered his house free, along with dog but the state of it was such that, "it is more of a burden than a reward, a price to pay to own a crippled dog...no way", as one of them put it.


A FAINT GLIMMER OF HOPE

He heard a knock on the door, on a snowy day in winter. a middle-aged man with an eccentric glimmer in his eye walked right in. "Show me the dog", he announced enthusiastically.
Jodie was lying in her kennel, on both her hindlegs, happy as usual. The man took a quick look at the dog and suddenly all his air of enthusiasm dropped. He turned his back on the dog, the door and finally the gate.
A golden retriever by itself is a rare breed, a golden retriever with two legs missing is rarer still but a man who doesn't mind broken limbs of the dog but cares that the dog's ear is slightly....possibly a centimetre longer than usual is the rarest of all.
"Let him go, I dont care, I couldn't give definitely give Jodie to this mental hospital escapee".


FLASHBACK

All his family had died yesterday-all in the concentration camp- and all in front of his eyes. Today, he was lined in front of 12 children....all ready to be shoved into the camp. Hatred now ran through his blood, his veins, his bones and his skin. Not when he had bored the soldier standing guard near the camp and let all the 12 children escape, did he feel happiness. It was when he ran all the bullets from the rifle into the guard did he savagely feel happy...feel that he had avenged his family. He also felt that he had signed a contract between himself and the guardian of those 12 children. "I will use this contract when i need it", he thought. He fled the place.


.......AND OF COURSE THE END

Since none of his schemes had worked as no one had taken his dog, he thought of the contract he had signed ages ago. He ran to the drawer and pulled it out to search for "a something related to the contract" that would today put the pact into force. It wasn't there. He found it carelessly lying on the table.
He slowly walked towards the kennel for Jodie who instantly stared up at him. "I found you a new owner", he said, "my best friend, he will never refuse you if i say so. He owes me a favour." Jodie was happier than usual. She was now licking the black object in his hand and seemed to be very jubiliated by it. "See", he said, "even you like it. You will like my friend better still. This is the key to his house." - A moment of silence- a muffled "REST IN PEACE" - a loud explosion - and a dead dog. The only bullet in the gun which was reserved for Adolf Hitler was in the dead dog's brain.
BLOOD AND TEARS MIXED.